Halloween Comedian Gifts

"It was a botched surgery."

Don't be fooled by the theatrics. She'll only suck your sap!

One vampire tricks another behind a mirror.

"I hope that's low calorie eye of newt."

"Yeah, I'm moonlighting. It's a living."

Dr. Frankenstein creates his newest monster, Frankenmime.

Macbeth: Take Two

"Sorry. My blood sugar has just been running a little low lately."

'Transylvania's most famous Optometrist 'Count Mracula'.'

Job Safety - Pumpkin.

The following is a paid political announcement.

"Johnson, you're new here, right? Mind if I pick your brain?"

"Some Debussy, Igor."

'It's a little varietal I bottle myself...Type A positive.'

Cat Frankenstein

"Well, sir, it looks like things are getting pretty serious for Peter and Pauline."

'Let's skip Mr. Arnold's house. He's the dog catcher.'

Fancy a pint?

'Needs more kale.'

"Sometime I feel people go out of their way just to scare me."

'You complete me.'

...your sales are rather anemic

"Well, we got the grant."

The Zombie Awakes...

'I told you that 2 month old balonie was cursed!'

"Your veins are too narrow. Let me get our in-house specialist to help."

Witch has Exorcise Video.

"Really, Larry? Of all the things that could have bitten you, you get a wereduck?"

A few Halloween costume ideas.

'I'm dressed as a vat inspector.'