Gym-loving Virtuosos Pillows

How the Fiddle Stays Fit.

'No, honestly, it's just diet and exercise.'

Powerful Love.

"(Huff) Here's (huff) your (huff) tea (huff... huff... huff... huff...)" "I will almost certainly regret asking you this, but what on earth are you doing, you cretin?" "All (huff) across America, (huff) office workers are ditching (huff) their desks and walking (huff) on treadmills while they work." "Can I get some water?" "Coming right up." "Good thing I wore my tripping shoes."

"It's true: no more burpees."

"I have to get down to 125 pounds before I go back to my real gym."

Mouse on an Exercise Bike

Advanced aerobicizers wait till after class to aid the fallen.

'And one, and two, and three, and don't get discouraged Manatee, and four, and five...'

'Much like my hairline and waistline, our numbers are trending in the wrong direction.'

'Keep fit.'

'Yes, yes, yes, now seriously, what can we do to improve our health?'

'Your request for a company vehicle has been approved, however, it's not the Cadillac you wanted. Since you need the exercise, you're getting a skateboard.'

'Then someone hit on the idea of selling our torture devices to fitness centers.'

"That's not the motivational reward I had in mind."

Candy Shop and Al's Gym:'We have heart-shaped candies' - 'We fix pear-shaped bodies'.

"You have to start exercising. Running your mouth, skipping breakfast, and jumping to conclusions doesn't count."

"This one is called 'Essence of Hockey Bag.'"

Muscular Santa

'I call this exercise 'Urban Aerobics'

"My Doctor said I needed more exercise so I jogged down to the donut shop."

Elevator is now equipped with stairclimber exercise machine.

"Smacked down by reality in 24 seconds."

'I don't mind you earning more money than I do, Gretchen, or driving a more expensive car, but do you have to bench press more than I do, too?'

"Whatever."

"A new record for the 2 handed snatch, press and hernia."

"He tried intermittent fasting. But settled on continual slowing."

The Ten Resolutions