Gym Attendance Gifts

"Do you have a one day a year membership?"

"I hope you are enjoying the walk..."

Man on exercise bike with dog on treadmill

Dietician to man: 'To address your spare tire we must first get in touch with your inner tube.'

'You've hit the fitness plateau.'

"A squirrel, impressive! I'm still chasing a stick."

"This feels like an accomplishment."

'Every piece of equipment is hooked up to battery cells in the basement, and we actually sell electricity back to the power company!'

On the back of the t-shirt...

"Today we'll be performing some much needed maintenance on Miss Trimbles weak pelvic floor."

'Well, well, well. It wasn't a 12 lb baby after all. It was a six pound one pumping iron.'

Bodybuilder pumping himself up.

Biceps, muscles and brawn

"OK, ready to go again?"

"All this spinning...shouldn't this be charging our phones or something?"

"I work out in preparation for being out of shape for the next 30 years."

"O.K. you're ready to go on to the less embarrassing weights."

Sam's Gym. My problem is I can't get the body I want with the body I've got!

"Uh-oh. My inner GPS is recalculating."

"Wait! Don't start the chase now: I need to stretch first!:

Where Skim Milk comes from.

Bench Press Accident

"It's true: no more burpees."

"We're exclusively delts."

'If you exercise you add 10 years to your life.' - 'But I would spend the 10 years exercising.'

"We hang like this for the incredible ab workout."

Exercising

'Every new year Gym membership goes up - for the Panto season.'

Woman walks her dog on a running machine.

'We're looking for athletic people.'

Executive gym with briefcases for weights.

"He's a dedicated lifter, but he always skips leg day."

"And then on ab day they roll on their backs, flail, and mimic us in the throes of death."

Exercise now!

Carrot in front of the donkey workout.