Gullibility Guru Gifts

Hadley K., All-Day Sucker.

'You look like someone who would believe anything....'

'Human Error .. Yet Again.'

You gotta hand it to the old man, he still knows how to motivate!

'Since we all have to believe in something, I thought, 'Why not money?''

"I want to have at least two children - I have too much guilt to give for just one."

'It was this big. I swear'

Happy hour.

How to cope in Los Angeles vs. New York

Gullib-Os

'Are you the guy who put gluten in the bread?'

'This exotic dessert I make is guilt-free. I already burned all the calories running around finding the ingredients!'

Modern Witch Shoppe

"I make money, therefore I am."

"I'm not all you can eat? But I brought my special plate!"

"I'd like a fat-free, gluten-free, MSG-free, mini, super-skinny, artisan latte please..."

'Just be patient. Greed always makes a come back.'

"The chef will accommodate gluten-free requests, but only with a note from your doctor."

Investments: Getting In Touch With Your Inner Greed

"I know one secret! Not spending $30 on a book filled with common sense!"

'Did anyone save a stomach for dessert?'

Humane Mouse Trap "It doesn't kill them,. It just makes them feel really guilty about inconveniencing you."

Buffet - now glutton free.

"What do you mean, 'There can be no ethics without fear of God'?! Look at me - all ethical and shit!"

"I was the first one to work completely gluten free."

A worm sits in comfort as he has just eaten 4 apples by himself...

Gluten-Free Church

"I tied his line around this log, then I tug on it once in awhile. He's gullible, because it's been three hours now."

"Perhaps a dirge would lift your spirits?"

The Gluten is Free. RUN!

Stocks dropped sharply on the rumor the government will appoint a greed czar.

"It was a lovely holiday. The chips crispy and delicious, the ice cream cornets were to die for, the only downside being, the hostility of the humans, who were reluctant to share their sustenance."

"Of course we should get equal pay, it's time men realised we're just as greedy as they are."

"If I order the gluten-free version, can I have the gluten on the side?"