Guinness World Records Fan Pillows

"274 meters of bandage - It looks as though you're going to make the Guiness Book of Records, Mr Henderson!"

Horace Dung Beetle- Guinness World Record Holder.

Paul Klee

Omar Khayyam Meets Trader Joe

Stephen Spender.

'Wow! That's got to be some sort of record!'

Psychiatrist with bust of Freud

'This is what Jack and me have managed to create so far...all you have to do is add your poop to the top and we have a field record!'

Spiders all over the place, "Hello, Guiness book of records?"

"Another world record - it must be faster water."

Still a Disappointment to his Mother

"George is going for the Guinness World Record for just sitting."

Davy Crocat

August Comte

Nikolai Rimsky-Korsakov.

Social median

St. Patrick's Day

Christopher Marlowe

'For a brief time I held the world record for the youngest person on earth.'

Ludwig van Beethoven

"Call me if it gets any bigger"

Pablo Picasso

'I think he would have been pleased to know that I got his entire record breaking bungee jump on video.'

'Face it -- you'll NEVER catch up to Lady Godiva's approval rating.'

7 Reasons You Might Be Irish. . .

Philosopher

"Mr Giles, when I recommended that investment to you, I was reading the wrong chart - a chart concerning home runs in the National League. But it didn't matter - the stock went up anyway."

'The same thing happened yesterday. I've got it...an apple a day.'

John Donne.

Benedictus de Spinoza

'Hello, Guinness Book of Records, what's the longest recorded sulk?'

'Oldest living turkey? I'll see if we have that category.'

Ralph holds the Guiness world record for nosehair!

World Records Office.

'The human speed endurance record holder is here to see you.'