Guinness Fan Gifts

7 Reasons You Might Be Irish. . .

St. Patrick's Day

"Finally, after years of work, irrefutable proof that I'm a nerd."

"Is it that bad?"

"We're following Carrot Top."

William Shakespeare a.k.a. Francis Bacon, Earl of Essex....

William Shakespeare sitting at a desk

'If I told you what I wished for, you'd probably slap me.'

Sauce for the Goose

The Da Vinci Cod

'Let's agree to dispense with the rules of nomenclature and call it compound X.'

'May I say it's a great pleasure to present my work to such a distinquished assembly of my colleagues.'

You're my Venus

"It'll take three wishes to get less cream cheese on your bagels in New York."

Information booth attendant solves equation

"A wise choice sir! Aah. . . Da Vinci - a genius of the Renaissance and a man who changed the face of art forever! Would you like that as a bookmark, a pencil sharpener or a fridge magnet. . . ?"

'...and that is my philosophy.'

'Let's see if we could put a spin on it and get the public interested.'

"274 meters of bandage - It looks as though you're going to make the Guiness Book of Records, Mr Henderson!"

"Lucky Guess."

"When we asked you to paint the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel, Michaelangelo, we were hoping you'd snazz it up."

"I think I've finally figured out who's on first."

'The early bird can have the worm as far as I'm concerned -- I'd rather sleep in and then go to McDonald's.'

'The early bird can have the worm as far as I'm concerned -- I'd rather sleep in and then go to McDonald's.'

"All in all, I'd say it's a pretty convincing explication of chaos theory."

'You had me at 'C - R C = (2 x S X).'

"Another selfie, Rembrandt?"

Rembrandt's Selfies

"To meet the girl of your dreams, swipe right on the lamp."

The Math Institute √π*962.9 KM

"I'm not loitering officer, I 'm waiting for the next renaissance!"

Formula.

'I ran as fast as I could, but I still couldn't catch the Gingerbread Man...'

Knight with paint tin on his head.

"Stop being creative and discover something already."