Guinness Enthusiasts Gifts

'I wonder if the guinness people would be interested in the world's record for the most time spent on hold.'

I love the Shard

'Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine... LAST!'

"274 meters of bandage - It looks as though you're going to make the Guiness Book of Records, Mr Henderson!"

"Okay, I fixed the leaking roof, and I moved the couch over to the far wall, but I'm sorry, I don't unblock toilets!"

Of all the gin joints in the world, you are here.

The successful rubbernecker...

'I'm very sorry, sir. Even for stressed out bankers, whiskey and gin aren't tax-deductible expenses.'

Henry's music career was ruined when a frog jumped into a glass of gin, and then jumped into his tuba where it is now permanently lodged.

'He's making preparations for his elderly care.'

'Can you make me taste like broccoli?'

"George is going for the Guinness World Record for just sitting."

Positive Thinking

No, we don't serve rubbing alcohol.

'Sorry, I don't do bailouts.'

'I'm kind of a survivalist myself. I roast my own coffee and distil my own gin.'

'Some dope wished to live for a thousand years, so I turned him into a sequoia!'

Guess what he is in the guinness book of records.

Gin & Tonic.

St. Patrick's Day

New Sheik'n'vac magic carpet freshners.

Hide and Seek

Scariest Tactics

London Gin Company Limited - By Appointment to Queen Mother

We're filling the void left by no Olympics by having an opening ceremony when removing caps from sodas.

"I can write beautiful poems, but they all rhyme with gin."

"I cant do that! Who's gonna deliver the mail?!"

'Oh, he's just my son here for bring your kid to work day.'

-"For instance, this gin and tonic does not have a single molecule of gin in it!" -"It's from the staff canteen, right!"

'How much gin will I need for three medium size lemons?'

'She's a little upset. Apparently, when the cosmetic surgeon asked her what kind of chin she'd like, she thought he said gin and asked for a double.'

"It's okay mate, I only need the cork from your bottle."

Genie being forced to walk Aladdin's dog

'The Giants vs. Trolls'

Aviation cocktail