Guilt Giggler Pillows

'I really don't need to go to church, Reverend -- I feel guilty enough without it.'

Clown God

Get on with it!

STRIP Hambone: Computer company job interview

The spirit in the wall would go on and ond, but Alvin never let it bother him.

Fancy a pint?

'You can come out, Marmaduke. I was just kidding about putting lipstick on you.'

'It was this big. I swear'

Looking at belt - "One more notch, room for desert."

'You said I should check back with you if I didn't get any better. . .'

'He's wearing a toupee.'

Yoga Sequence to Avoid

'U. . .S. .U. .C. .K. . . . L. . O. . L.'

"I'm the black sheep of the family because I'm afraid of the dark."

"Can you write 'To Mandy - you're the best'?"

'Man, I'm bombing,'

'This is the third time you've gone to the bathroom tonight. Are you seeing another woman in there?'

'That was so funny. I haven't booed that loudly in years.'

'But seriously , folks, I know you're out there, I can hear you bleeding!'

"I can't create your bride until you make your co-pay."

'You Have a food allergy. Even worse it's to 'O' type!'

'Why are ghosts bad at telling lies?'

'Whoops!'

Ghosts save on electrical & plumbing maintenance costs because they don't need easy access to the inside of walls.

Drac, I gotta have a better office if I'm gonna market your Tomato Juice.

A Grumble Bee

'We find the defendant to be TOAST.'

'They're evolving like mad -- You put in way too many cosmic rays!'

'Say, how can I convert this FAT file into a nice and small JPG?'

When suddenly the clouds parted and down came Jeez, a god appalled by how his name is used in vain.

Confession Ratings.

CHAUCER 411, 'Boy -- that guy spells worse than I do!'

"I have four stomachs and one of them always seems to be hungry.''

'I need a lawyer who specializes in guilty people.'

'It needs more punctuation.'