Guardian Of Highways Gifts

"You've already adopted seven highways, can you really handle eight?"

'Dang it, I just washed this street. Boy, every time...'

Caution: Driver Watching "Hard Copy"

"It's a new year, and I have a brand new attitude. Which way is it to San Diego Sea World?"

"Careful."

Bottled water straight from the Potomac, Congo and Ganges. Bottled waters that never had much market share.

"Sometimes, plastic in the ocean isn't bad... Ooh, that bottle cap will make a lovely bowl for Ed and Nicole!"

'I'm getting some unusually high readings around you.'

Ofwat Sewage Scrutiny

The proper way to wear your mask

'Sue's troubles with the law began the day she bought that first motorbike.'

Earth Day Summit.

'At 11:35 it's the SLOW sign. At 11:39, the STOP sign. At 11:43 it's back to the SLOW sign. At 11:49 you break for lunch. At 1:00 it's the STOP sign...'

Architects and Engineers - Restoration of old Buildings.

Man in car sees fallen sign on the hood of his car which says, CAUTION sign-holding road worker falls asleep.

'Eye response, normal.' - Deer Physicals.

'I don't suppose you're just writing me a Valentine?'

You observed me speeding? Are you familiar with the Heisenberg uncertainty principle?

Speed Limit Enforced from Aircraft.

NEXT EXIT Food & Drink Cafe...Open 24 hours: 'Hey! Here's the place we saw advertised on the freeway!'

"Ma'am, do you know how well you were driving?"

'Which end's the shallow end?'

"60 may be the new 50 in the fantasy land you live in, but here in the real world, it's called exceeding the speed limit."

"It's a very effective scarecrow."

"My pappy built this shell with his bare claws. I'll be damned if some freeloader moves in."

"...Apparently we're responsible for snow removal on that stretch of highway we adopted."

Man at Heaven's gate with different college letter than St. Pete

I work all day landscaping. I'm too tired to do all the yard work at home. Teddy, you're big enough to use my power tools. I know exactly who to call for help. Tap tap tap. Not the power tool I was referring to.

Monkey steeling Eggs. Bird attacking monkey.

'Uh oh, there's an icebreaker coming our way!'

Deer sitting in house surrounded by mounted human heads.

"Have they no shame?"

'Me…me…catch me!'

'I'm telling you, with the right moisturizer and lip balm you could avoid all of that chaffing.'

Fisherman catching rubbish.