Grumpy Vibe Appreciator Gifts

Never Satisfied.

Sign on desk reads: 'Thanks for not wishing me a nice day.'

'Why do they call these conventions when everyone here is so unconventional?'

"I hope you don't call that a party face."

"There has been a sharp increase in his cantankerousness."

'You're so nice and friendly that I've got nothing to moan about. That's a bit of cheek!'

"He's So Your Type."

Grumpy old merry men.

"Don't worry, he's improving. We'll have him up and cursing the government again."

"You have the Hum bug.'

'I swear I didn't know you'd heard that joke before...'

'Life is like a box of chocolate laxatives!' - Forest Grump

'Oooh, looks like the welcome wagon is on its way!'

Grumpy Old Men

'I know how you feel.'

"Sometimes, on days like this, I feel like the world is conspiring to make me happy."

At the Irritable Bowel Syndrome Convention.

'Self-help books for cynics'

"He might be moody, but he's the best in the city...and worth every penny!"

"Actually, lactose is the only thing Herb isn't intolerant of."

'Kids get right up my nose!'

"People keep telling me that it takes more facial muscles to frown than it does to smile... I tell them that I am working out."

Uncle Murray Weekly

"Well, we’ve covered the weather, my prostate, your incontinence … I suppose our idiot children are up next?"

"Is everything okay, dear? You're smiling!"

"He's learning how to mutter in Spanish

'Maybe the world isn't getting less friendly, maybe you're just getting grumpier.'

'Maybe the world isn't getting less friendly, maybe you're getting grumpier.'

Wife about mad man leaving church: 'You'll have to excuse my husband. He always wakes up grumpy.'

"It's armageddon week on TV. The death of hope always lightens his mood."

'Be advised, Monday through Thursday I don't do 'perky'.'

'I've had it with your bright, sunny, upbeat...'

"Everything okay, Wilson?"

Bakery Window: Cross Buns and Cross Gingerbread Men!

'When did I become so old and morose?' 'I know. It seems only yesterday you were young and morose.'