Grocery Rebels Gifts

8 People or Less Who Don't Shop at Tesco.

"It was terrifying experience being faced with that kind of compulsive, insane behaviour...I tell you it's positively the last time I put foot in the sales!"

Thou Shalt Not!

Garlic Free Zone.

"We'll start with the dessert menu."

"Valet park only"

Culinary Breakthroughs During Social Distancing

Pirates at the mall.

Blog Breakdown

Toxic Waste Lorry/Toxic Additives Lorry

"I've called this meeting so I could see all of you squirm."

"Red wine with fish? Sometimes you really are a monster."

'I like thinking inside the box.'

Smoke and Mirrors: Harold couldn't work out why his new store wasn't getting any customers.

"I can highly recommend the peanut-butter-and-jelly sandwich, served with a chilled glass of milk."

"You betrayed her trust. You added spices to her soup. In Tia Carmen's eyes, you are an irresponsible youngster...and I don't blame her for doing this."

'Mom, I followed your time-honored legendary family recipe for Brussels Spout Bake with one exception - I substituted a pizza for the Brussels Sprouts.'

Melvin would go to any lengths to get away from McDonald's advertising...

Hey, Ernie, you're trying on costumes for the Halloween party! No, I'm finding clothes for my job at the store. I need to fit in the Christmas Decorations there. They've been up for weeks. It's too soon! I don't like decorations going up so early! Cupid's another way I could dress for work. The Valentine's Day decorations are going up right now!

"We'll get your food going as soon as the exterminators are done in the kitchen."

Woman on diet being chased by temptation.

"So the only way to save the economy is to spend what we haven't got - plus ca change - moin ca change!"

Punkcakes

'Conglomo Corporation: Proud manufacturer of outrageously useless stuff you apparently can't live without.'

'This week, the secret ingredient on Iron chef is . . . Iron. Good luck, suckas.'

"I made a big mistake getting into ladies underwear..."

Sally and her fashionista friends get to me. Save our mall! Ignore them! Let's take your mind off them. Don't even think it! I know. Going shopping would be wring. Does ordering online count.

"Ordering groceries online can be unpredictable."

'Cookery is the new rock n' roll'

"The Corned Beef Cappuccino needs work."

Anarchist Cutlery: Soup Knife/ Bread Fork, Steak Spoon.

Mom & Dad Recipe Corner

"Well, I don't care if it is some kind of fancy-schmancy restaurant...if I want ketchup, I'm gonna get ketchup!"

Abuse or harassment of staff will not be tolerated

It's a gingerbread cyclops....I ran out of raisins!