Grind Philosophers Pillows

"I really didn't enjoy working five days a week, fifty weeks a year for forty years, but I needed the money."

"How was my day? I'm still calculating the little victories minus the humiliations I normally suffer."

Commutobile

Monday: Next 7 exits.

'A man has to believe in something. I believe I'll have another drink!'

I hate monday mornings.

"Son, the world is full of disappointments. About 7.7 billion of them."

Getting through the week.

'Would you like a push Dear?'

"My parents are going to pay for my education but I'm on my own for any attorney's fees."

And I intend to fill it. For nature abhors a vacuum.'

Newton Discovers Surrealism.

"Well, once you get your PhD on 'The Return of the Repressed in Early Jacobean Drama', then we;ll discuss how disappointed you are."

'It had taken some time, but the finding of a spaghetti junction brought immense satisfaction.'

"Whole bean or ground relentlessly to dust?"

"Well, this must be as big as I'm supposed to get."

Two books. One liberates the mind, and appears to fly. The other entraps the mind, and appears as a snare trap

"Eve, do you realize that neither you nor I ever had a childhood?"

'I don't have a single appointment between 1:30 and 2. Do you want me questioning the meaning of my existence?'

"The Talmudic umpire It may have been a strike, since it cut the corner of the plate, and yet it was a trifle high, but not really that high, and yet it seemed to curve over the plate..."

'Well, that answers that age-old question. According to the tape, the chicken came first. . . which brings up another age-old question: is the last one a rotten egg?'

Commuter reads book entitled: Commuters for Dummies.

'My Turing Machine doesn't understand me.'

"If everyone is gonna get a universal basic income, what is the point of getting good grades?"

Evolution explained.

'A wise man once said if you are down to your last penny you should buy flowers and not bread. . .'

"Remind me, what's the difference between a metaphor and a simile?"

"At first it bothered me, but then I realized, 50 growth rings is the new 40 growth rings."

Janus.

'Embrace nonviolence!', 'I don't see how THAT'S going to help.'

Rene Descartes

"There's an uncertain feeling in the air..."

"You must be the change you wish to see in the world."