Green-thumbed Fashionista T-Shirts

'Did you know the gardener also does hair?'

"I wanted to plant my own food, but I couldn't find bacon seeds!"

The Music Seed

'The Prom Dress: One Week Later'

Dog on balconey in city sniffing tree in pot

Goddess of Fertility garden feature

"Oh no, it's Flash Garden!"

"I hear that bamboo is all the rage this year."

'It's better than we expected. Now the sheep produce wool in the winter and cotton in the summer.'

Paving over the window-box

Where Pleather Comes From

"You make me feel 'hole'."

Urban Gardens

M&S goes green - Carbon Neutralising Underpants.

"This weather changes in a heart-beat! I moved here last year and am never sure how to dress!"

"Did you throw away this tabletop?"

'To be built on this site - Farm' - 'Confounded reactionaries!'

Relax, it's fake fur.

"Do you have anything less - green?"

'Do the flu masks come in other colors?'

Hey fairest of the all! Tell me you're not going outside without your SPF 50!

'It's getting late. We should set up camp here and start out again in the morning.'

Last season's mobile phones - recycling.

Botox pump outside a cosmetology clinic.

"It's made of all-natural materials, but needs a little wedding on occasion!"

'You stop buying books and I'll stop buying plants.'

"I want something sassy but easy to take care of if the ice caps melt."

Venus Fly Trap Hat

Manure as Fertilizer and other Tales of Derring-Doo.

'We've reduced the carbon footprint of this model to a size 5 with stiletto heels.'

'Muriel makes all her own clothes out of junk mail.'

'It' really nothing - we're just doing a bit of recycling.'

"A protestor told me I shouldn't wear leather so I got a fake leather jacket..."

"I told you that 'biodegradable' pants were a bad idea!"

"This is of course a totally fake fur coat and ten thousand dollars is a lot of money, but quality and political correctness cost!"