Green Jacket Dreamer Gifts

Seniors Pro (putt putt) Golf Tour.

"I wanted to be a baseball player 'til I found out they send you to the showers."

"Just a couple of ninety cent seed packets, and you can have fresh garden vegetables for heaven knows how long."

'Oh yeah, your dad might be on 4-1 in this afternoon's race, but mine is on 3-1!'

'Yeah, I know your idea of heaven is to play golf all day, but all we have is shuffleboard!'

It can be taken up at any age....

"Getting the ball in the hole on the first swing is good isn't it?"

"I came to save you, but everything I can think to do seems like it wouldn't actually make that much of a difference."

Midnight Basketball

'More homes and wind turbines planned.'

The Amateur Golfer

Save our Planet.

"How about this? We carpet the road and use the resultant static electricity to power our electric cars."

'I've been watering myself by taking showers. How come I'm not growing as tall as your plants?'

Grass huggers.

(No caption). Woman bundled up against the cold weather smiles as she thinks of a big ripe red tomato.

Baseball Dreams

'I don't think we can justify employing a gardener.'

Lionel Messi

I'm filling out my myface.com and I have a question. Rudy Park, tech genius, at your service. Should I pretend to be 10,12 or 26 years old? 32? I configure browsers, not fake personas! I think I'll play for the Broncos.

Not The Real Me

Flower seed and Bird seed

'I want to be a professional Polo player too when I grow up...Can I have your autograph please?'

"Kid's today!"

"You want England to win what!? Put me back in the lamp!"

"I might let the window box lay fallow, this season."

Penalty

"It's a victory garden. And the weeds have won."

"I'm thinking about working on something really big, but for now I'm just happy keeping my plants alive."

Wordplay: Mind Games.

The First Seed Catagogues of Spring!

'When do I learn to read and sign a huge NFL contract?'

'Dad could use one of these when he's playing golf.'

'There was a time when I considered making myself available for the NBA draft. But one day I realized, hey - I'm a slug! I don't have an athletic bone in my body!'

Go away. I'm writing a poem on the fragility of mother earth. That'll help. Take chemistry and math if you want to save the environment. You don't need to know anything about science to tell people how to live better lives. True. You could be a congressman. Congressperson ... and good idea.