Green Grocery Guru Gifts

Organic or Toxic - It depends what you can afford.

Woman at checkout signposted '8kg of carbon or less.'

"Your food didn't melt, young man... this is the soup course."

Domestic Superheroes!!

'Sparky, fetch me an impudent little chardonnay.'

"And the cheese in your omelette? Cheddar, Brie, aged Gouda, Morbier, Torta del Casar, Double Gloucester, Époisses, Shropshire blue, or American?"

The Environmentalist

"The chef is going to need more than just your ‘compliments’ tonight … he’s in one of his moods."

"And which regional cuisine would you be interested in this evening—Northwester, Southwestern, Southeastern, or Northeastern?"

"It's kohlrabi, the next hot vegetable."

"Waiter! Two of your finest menus!"

'Of course you're very dear to me - that meal just cost a fortune.'

'I want to make a positive environmental statement - What do you suggest I order?'

'Why, of course I remember our first date -- I had filet mignon, potatoes au gratin, sauteed....'

'We're here to carbon date your company's carbon footprint.'

But is it organic?

How can he sleep so comfortably knowing that pillow will someday be clogging a land fill...

"Tonight, perhaps Mrs. Lewis would prefer this quiet little table for two from which to send back her entrée?"

"I just finished your manuscript and I found the ending delicious."

Heavy man sees 'Comfort Food' aisle

'I'm a vegetarian.' - 'If it's so wrong to eat animals, why are they made out of meat?'

"Compliments to the chef! Pass it on."

'Waiter...my entrée fell over.'

Omar Khayyam Meets Trader Joe

"Can you romance me after my tiramisu?"

"Everything taste so divinely artisanal."

Correct Comics *Drawn By A Vegetarian On Acid-Free Recycled Paper In A Drug-Free Environment

"Hmmm ... you're right — I forgot the brie."

'You realize we're only having three people over...'

"Yes, we have blue cheese. Do you want it in electric, sky or navy blue?"

French wine

'No, I'm not the sommelier; in fact, I don't even work here - I've just always wanted to try this wine.'

"Pizza sounds wonderful. Italian, Greek or Hipster?"

'Well, kids, it all started with a massive Federal program to combat global warming....'

'I go to St. Patrick's Church, I go to St. Patrick's School, and my name is Patrick. Is it also necessary for me to eat green food?'