Great-grandfather Gifts

"The Balkans. This is where I came in."

"It's true. Your great-grandfather was right there at the beginning of blackened redfish."

'Yeah...I'm 100!'

'When you live 900 years, you find that your great-great-great-great grandchildren never come to visit.'

Despite years of asking people to not wear out his name, eventually ****** was left with nothing but nubs.

'And this is Great Grandpa Bobo. They say he slipped on a banana peel and died, but I think it was just a heart attack.'

'Grandpups? Get with it, Rodney, let's talk great-grandpups!'

'To what do you attribute your longevity?'

'The company was started by your great grandad who used to collect horse droppings.'

'I thank God every day that Great - Grandfather made the most of his peak earning years!'

"Yeah, my great-grandpa was shell-shocked in World War One too..."

"It's amazing, Darlin', just how fast the kids grow up!"

"My granddaughter's first words to me were 'OK, Boomer.' I have no idea what that even means."

'Isn't that cute! They're thanking us.'

"Being raised in the city, Fred didn’t quite grasp the true purpose of a game camera."

"Bark or stare? Always a tough decision. Bark? Maybe stare? Whimper? Maybe? Meanwhile, stare."

The Games Man: Fishing is his sole form of exercise - but he considers it bad form to move more than his wrist when casting.

City Zoo: Day Care

"And the last little piggy cried, 'Oui, oui, oui' all the way home."

"Bond James, Bond."

"Can I borrow the car keys?"

"In high school, I was quite the star in metal shop."

"Her first word was 'paparazzi'. "

Prize vegetables.

'Couldn't Peter claim Mr. McGregor's garden was an 'attractive nuisance?'

The Busy Gardener

"Is he talking yet? I was hoping he could help me with my new phone."

'Boy, the fish are really biting today, aren't they, Fred?'

"Did I hear the dog in here?"

'It's a nice idea. A bit rough around the edges but I'm sure it will evolve given time.'

"No, it wasn't a sinkhole. Your old TV was so heavy the ground could no longer take the weight."

I like the Jets...I guess

"A wet winter, but we're making the best of it."

"Don't worry, dear. You'll grow."

'Please tell me you're baby sitting?'