Grass Warrior Gifts

'I fought the lawn and the lawn won.'

"He can't decide which one he likes best. . .His leaf blower, his weed wacker, or his metal detector."

Humans...What is their purpose?

Dear Santa, please can I have a powerful herbicide for Christmas. Best wishes, Adam.

Cat in a tank...

'We use to tiptoe through the tulips. . . now we just waddle through the weeds.'

"I love you too, big guy."

"This has nothing to do with you ... this is between us and the tree."

Sale! Weed Whackers

The eco club is starting a locavore movement here at school. "Loco" what? Eating fresh food, grown locally. So? So everyone eats healthier and uses less energy. Um � Ok. I'll tell my mom. Who are those people. Locobores.

'Ok..Ok...I'm putting the lawnmower back in the shed!'

Indigenous knowledge vs. climate projections and weather forecasts.

Lawnmower

Fish want out of polluted river.

'Doesn't it feel good to be taking care of our planet?'

"Must get a longer cable."

'May the forest be with you.'

'First weeds of spring.'

Mr. Cranky Pants Plants A Garden Part 9

"Al emerged from his man cave and saw crabgrass. That means 6 months of obsessing about crabgrass."

'I'm finding the greens a bit slow.'

Meanwhile, back on planet earth...Greenland's ice sheet is melting faster than previously thought, sea levels could rise..."

Look! There's a photo of our eco club's Earth Day actions in the newspaper! Sports. Power up the green machine!! I could use more copies. Me too. They're going to really power up my college applications.

Language purists bring correctness to a whole new level, forcing a name change for Ireland's most famous band.

"Tempting, but I'm on a plastic cleanse this week."

I want to talk about the environment...

"Al Gore happens to be a friend of mine."

It's the biofuel generation.

Urban cops protecting a flower growing in the city.

"What I miss during school holidays is not going out on strike every Friday."

"You look like you could use a hug."

"Those eco-terrorists are going to cost us a FORTUNE!!"

"What am I, chopped liver?"

So those are your 'weapons of mass destruction? - Slugs?

The Authentic Christmas.