Grammy Watcher Gifts

Arturo Sandoval

"And just like that, e got rid of Florida."

Tennis fans queuing at Wimbledon.

Bowled over again!

'Einsteiners.'

"Let's go watch TV I hear there are bowl games on."

Monica Seles

Tree house.

This is a great game --- All except for that blimp. It keeps reminding me I've already broken my diet resolution. Pizza. Chips.

Novak Djokovic

"For most people, the sense of panic will be mild."

'Och lye the news'

Couch and Potato

"Would you mind adjusting the vibrate on your phone? There's a seismologist on TV claiming there's been an earthquake in our neighborhood."

'The English player has hit the net more times than the entire England team in the football World Cup!'

Please stand by. As stocks soar, our announcer is having a fit of the giggles.

"Scientists confirmed today that everything we know about the structure of the universe is wrongedy-wrong-wrong."

'Harry! - If you can hear me - what did you do with the remote!?'

"Or we could turn on the TV and let younger, more beautiful people have sex for us."

"In two weeks' time, Andy Murray will either have achieved a great British win or an awful Scottish defeat."

It's a Dog's life

"Then we agree. 10 minutes of your news, then 10 minutes of mine."

"I'm the bluebird of PMS. Fetch me some decaf and turn on the air conditioner. I'm burning up in here!"

"So much for finding intelligent life on this planet."

Djargo.

'The opinions expressed by Burt are not necessarily those of Ernie.'

Strike 3! 'Dammit - all I can think about is that $5,350,000!'

"Today, in all aspects of life losses outnumbered gains."

"Just another 50 decibels on your grunt and we can start to think about letting you hit a few balls!"

'According to the latest reports, there were no earlier reports.'

I love tennis

'The sword in the stone was just a warm-up - now you must remove this remote control ...'

'I got my degree by watching JEOPARDY.'

"This should be interesting. . . they're giving an acting award for best political lie. . ."

"All the atmosphere of 'Murray Mound' but in the comfort of your own home!"