Grammy Watcher Pillows

Arturo Sandoval

"And just like that, e got rid of Florida."

Tennis fans queuing at Wimbledon.

"Let's go watch TV I hear there are bowl games on."

Tree house.

"For most people, the sense of panic will be mild."

'Och lye the news'

Please stand by. As stocks soar, our announcer is having a fit of the giggles.

Couch and Potato

"Would you mind adjusting the vibrate on your phone? There's a seismologist on TV claiming there's been an earthquake in our neighborhood."

"Scientists confirmed today that everything we know about the structure of the universe is wrongedy-wrong-wrong."

'Harry! - If you can hear me - what did you do with the remote!?'

"Or we could turn on the TV and let younger, more beautiful people have sex for us."

"In two weeks' time, Andy Murray will either have achieved a great British win or an awful Scottish defeat."

It's a Dog's life

"Then we agree. 10 minutes of your news, then 10 minutes of mine."

"Today, in all aspects of life losses outnumbered gains."

"Just another 50 decibels on your grunt and we can start to think about letting you hit a few balls!"

Djargo.

"I'm the bluebird of PMS. Fetch me some decaf and turn on the air conditioner. I'm burning up in here!"

'According to the latest reports, there were no earlier reports.'

"So much for finding intelligent life on this planet."

Strike 3! 'Dammit - all I can think about is that $5,350,000!'

'The opinions expressed by Burt are not necessarily those of Ernie.'

'The sword in the stone was just a warm-up - now you must remove this remote control ...'

I love tennis

"This should be interesting. . . they're giving an acting award for best political lie. . ."

"All the atmosphere of 'Murray Mound' but in the comfort of your own home!"

Man ignores a football kicked through the window because his attention is on the TV.