Graduation Comedy Lover Pillows

Ten Years to get the Ph.D

'I took a couple of years off after college to work on my smirk.'

T-Rex as a graduation speaker. Everything was going well until someone in the first row moved!"

Now Firing.

'Welcome graduates, parents, guests, faculty, and home equity loan officers.'

"I'd like to propose a bill to the effect that we can remain freshmen indefinitely."

Bovine Proctology Graduation

"In an effort to avoid controversy, and to accommodate our attention spans, we will be replacing the commencement speaker with fortune cookies."

"In conclusion, I hope you all make plenty of money to donate to your alma mater."

Principal: 'Is THERE a DOCTORATE in the House?!'

'My son is away at college, majoring in communications. He never calls and he never writes.'

"Sometimes I wish I went to a magnet school."

"They can't eliminate gymnastics! With our school's overcrowding, we need it!"

Some New Mortarboard Styles.

"Let me guess, you joined Alpha Delta Dogma"

The Pi Advantage

A Guide to Academic Gowns and Hoods

"I don't care whay they do at college, you'll scrub them off at once"

"Are you nuts? If we say we've found the sun is a White Hole we'll lose our funding!"

A credit to his species...

"Jack is graduating at home from home school."

"Wow! Your dog really is smarter than an honor roll student!"

Admit it! You're gonna miss High School. Best 5 1/2 Years of Your Life.

'The first thing I gotta do is pay off my loan. My roommate loaned me 6 bucks last week for beer.'

'It's outrageous - they don't want to be proper students like us at all - they come here to work!'

A teacher in mortar board and gown