Graduation Aficionado Gifts

Each one respresents another honor.

"Class of 2008, never let the excuse 'I can't find my pants' stand in the way of your dreams."

Graduates on their phones

'I had no idea there would be a test.'

Now Firing.

"Just where do you think you're going? You don't have the brains to graduate!"

"Dad, now can I be a fireman?"

"This is not the first time I have been asked to speak."

I'm forgetting which college is which. Their brochures are all alike. University of. It's always fall or spring. Apply! There's always a multi-cultural group of kids hanging out. There's always a girl in goggles working in a science lab with an ethnic-looking prof. It's reassuring. They all celebrate their diversity in the exact same way! And charge the exact same for it!

Principal: 'Is THERE a DOCTORATE in the House?!'

'That concludes the list of students with outstanding grades. And now for those of you with outstanding student loan payments...'

Zombie Academy Graduation Ceremony

Some New Mortarboard Styles.

Cards for All Occasions. Wedding. Get Well. Grads. Congrats. Friendship. Birthday. One "graduation" and one "condolences" … He's afraid of the real world.

'..And remember, your success will be measured in how much you donate to the university's alumni fund.'

A Guide to Academic Gowns and Hoods

Admit it! You're gonna miss High School. Best 5 1/2 Years of Your Life.

'What makes you think you're so smart?'

'Hurry up, I gotta go to the bathroom!'

"Jack is graduating at home from home school."

A credit to his species...

"Wow! Your dog really is smarter than an honor roll student!"

Graduating cats play with their mortar boards.

Shooting a spitball at the Dean on graduation day.

Their son was in a class of his own.

"Hey! Mine is a list of debt counselors."

A teacher in mortar board and gown

Jack Russell gets a Doctorate

Law graduate sharks.

'I seem to recall my pre-school graduation ceremony was called 'so what'.'

'The Graduate' updated.

"It's a tuition bill."

"Sometimes I think we want this more than he does."

Truancy Graduation

I've been looking forward to this moment for years but always pictured it much differently.