Grade Guardians Gifts

"Your mother and I have seen your report card, and we've decided to distance ourselves from you."

"You said you didn't want to see another bad report card so you'd better wear this blindfold."

"Aren't you worried about what my parents, relatives, and neighbors will think about this school if you only give me an A-?"

'You need to get your grades up...because good grades are an early sign of good credit scores.'

"He likes it."

"In economics, I got an IOU."

"Is there any way I could get a dashboard instead of a report card?"

'Ok..Ok...I'm putting the lawnmower back in the shed!'

'You must be Jimmy's father . . .'

'Does the Fifth Amendment apply to report cards?'

'Hi Dad. I want you to meet Mr. Hacketal, my attorney.'

"Ok, so you beat me at scrabble!"

'Come on, Walter, you're wasting out time! Stop using complete sentences!'

"How'd I do on the test?"

"Why do small children ask so many questions?" "Why not? We need to learn, don’t we? Anyway it’s no big deal is it? Isn’t that what parents are for? You were probably the same, weren’t you? So why complain?"

"These fourth grade marks are confusing...I got a B on the assignment, so is that like a smiley face or a star?"

"Boy, the kids are growing up so fast!"

Beware of the Lawn

"But it did take hard work to get my A, B, C and D in that order down the card."

"And what did my little darling do in school today?"

"Report card."

Examiners.

'I figured if 1 is good for milk, why not schoolwork, too?'

'I don't know whether these are good grades or not. The teacher calls them unique.'

"We like to think he's experimenting with color and form, but his art therapist suggested we're not giving him enough candy."

'Mistakes were made...'

"Of course I mind—they're mine, and I want all of them."

'After what you said about mine, guess whose Mum has just found in the attic?'

"Great! I've finally mastered all my competencies and my teachers still have most of their hair."

Spilled Milk

"All As? Are you hacking into the school's records again?"

"Our accountant is great. We were a C corp, but now we're a B- corp."

"We've given it a great deal of thought and we decided we're going to give in to everything you want at all times."

'Straight A's. That means good.'

We pride ourselves on having every type of insurance policy, but report card insurance is a new one to us.