Grade-grubber Gifts

"I figure I have about 20 years of school to go."

Academic Idol - 'Professor Johannsen's paper was zippy. It had robust vocabulary and I almost felt that I could dance to it. I would give it a 7.'

"I like going to school...and I like coming home from school. It's all the stuff in the middle that gives me trouble."

"Can you change this quiz grade from an A to a C? I like to keep expectations low until I blow my parents' mind by acing the final exam."

"Well, look at the bright side, Timmy — you're 100 percent wrong."

'I got an alleged C on my criminal law test.'

"In economics, I got an IOU."

"Is there any way I could get a dashboard instead of a report card?"

"God works in mysterious ways."

"I started a collection!"

'Hi Dad. I want you to meet Mr. Hacketal, my attorney.'

"How'd I do on the test?"

"These fourth grade marks are confusing...I got a B on the assignment, so is that like a smiley face or a star?"

"I just feel like I'm constantly disappointing parents everytime I appear on report cards."

Grim Reapers sitting their 'Finals'.

"But it did take hard work to get my A, B, C and D in that order down the card."

'I figured if 1 is good for milk, why not schoolwork, too?'

"Report card."

'I would kill for a truffle.'

"And what did my little darling do in school today?"

'What makes me mad, I was only a couple seats away from all the right answers!'

Examiners.

'I can't have you spending all of your money on fancy restaurants like this, Jeff.'

'I don't know whether these are good grades or not. The teacher calls them unique.'

"I think she marked yours in blue pen because she used up all her red on mine."

'Can I help it if she's a rotten teacher?'

"Great! I've finally mastered all my competencies and my teachers still have most of their hair."

"All As? Are you hacking into the school's records again?"

"Our accountant is great. We were a C corp, but now we're a B- corp."

'Straight A's. That means good.'

We pride ourselves on having every type of insurance policy, but report card insurance is a new one to us.

"Dude, I've never seen you so happy about a 'B' before."

"'C' isn't EITHER the new 'A'!"

'So, you see, Dad, if we compare our overall school performance, I'm actually doing better than you did at my age.'

GCSE's