Gourmet Hot Dog Lover T-Shirts

'It's just hot dogs. What does the health department care about hot dogs?'

'Oh, and I suppose I'm the only one who's ever heard it's a 'dog eat dog world'?'

"Hmmm... low ash content. Smells like someone switched to canola oil... wait, is that tripe I smell?"

"Any of you guys feel like hot dogs?"

"I cook the sausages in French mineral water, I wear a French beret and I can call you 'Monsieur'."

How The Sausage Is Eaten

Artisan hot dog stand has pigs tethered to it.

The Classy Dog: 'Dine & dance hotdogs: '50 cents a dance'.

Back in 5 minutes!

"Dare I ask for mustard?"

Hot Dog Animals: $2

Oh no ... Outsourcing

"Make me one with everything!"

'Mustard, ketchup and mayo are all nice and creamy smooth. Why isn't anything being done about relish?'

Nothing puts the flavor in a hot dog like a sports event.

"Hey, this is just a bun!" "Help yourself to the mustard."

"I brought my lunch."

"I can never go metric. 'Al's 30.48 Centimeter Hot Dogs' just doesn't sound right."

"They're marinated in hot water for six hours."

'I hear they're really good.'

"She doesn't eat raw zebra... Where can we get Alaska wild salmon in cream truffle sauce in the middle of Africa?"

'I usually take my new clients to nicer places. But my expense account isn't what it used to be.'

It had taken a team of engineers at IBM over a decade and had cost more than 50 million dollars, but that nigh, when Eat-Bot 4000 finally broke the record for hot dogs in an hour, it was all worth it.

'No tables are available at this time. Would you be interested in take-out?'

"That's $3.50 for the dog plus 75 cents toxic cooking water disposal surcharge."

Joe Hundredaire

"Is the parchment in the salmon en papillote humanely raised?"

"Kibbled, canned and frozen were non-starters. But he'll often accept a ice ribeye as long as it's been properly dry aged."

Dogs of war.

"Aren't you worried you might poison your customers?"

'A three means I want to break for a hot dog.'

Car dealers free hotdogs - "The best I can do is mustard and relish, ketchup and onions are optional."

'What have you got?'