Gourmet Food Gifts

"Just one I'd like to see a menu."

"We will always have Paris."

"And should you retain us, Mr. Hodal, you'll find that we're more than just a law firm."

'You'll find it has a bouquet reminiscent of cherries and chocolate, a silky texture and best of all, for me, a 72% gross margin.'

"Your meal will be out shortly. The salmon was a little wilder than we anticipated."

The wine and water lists.

Now at the Farmers' Market

'Oh great. All we've got to eat are fish.'

"Steak? Let's go with the fish. It's brain food. After, if you still think eating steak is a good idea, we'll do that."

"Perhaps Monsieur would care for something more expensive?"

'It was a '67 Chateau d'Yquem? I say leave it on.'

"Well I wouldn't eat it, but don't let that put you off."

"We aren't so different, you and I. But, for whatever reason, you're a common breakfast snack, and I'm a delectable treat, revered the world over and reserved for special occasions. Helluva world, brother! Just glad I'm not in your paper sleeve."

'Fruits, vegetables, meat, eggs and cooked beans! He gets a better dinner than I do!'

"...the soup of today is more or less yesterday's chef's special......"

'Good afternoon! I'll be your rescue dog today, offering a fine selection of brandies while Bernard will be along shortly with the cheese and biscuits.'

"I don't think there's time for a quadrille."

'His Trout Almondine Veal Cordon Blue in mushroom sauce was crudely seasoned.'

"Whatever is quickest - I'm starving!"

'Of course I'd never have so much as looked at Timothy if it wasn't for his nose for truffles.'

'I wish you the best of luck with your stoicism, Goopta -- As for me, I'm going to give epicureanism a try.'

"Which of tonight's specials is the most sanctimonious?"

Please wait to be vetted

'Make it four beers and an '02 Brunello di Montalcino, if you've got it, for you-know-who.'

Cheese of the Week: Brie

"Orthopaedic Surgeon are we? Well, you'll enjoy our spare ribs as starters followed by a main course of either Leg of Lamb, Shoulder of Pork, or Neck Chops."

'The recipe calls for blubber, onion, carrot, olive oil, lemon and tomato. I left out the onion, carrot, olive oil, lemon and tomato.'

"You're right-they are sliders!"

'Fruity nose, hints of wild cherry, soothing & gelatinous on the palate, goes well with cough and cold.'

'What wine goes well with venison?'

"The crab bisque, the tournedos, the bourbon soufflé... Thank you so much for trying."

"Sorry, sir. But if you can't pronounce it, you can't have it."

"Our chef specializes in atomic gastronomy."

"We find shopping at the farmers' market to be more self-congratulatory."

'So to sum up this lengthy discussion: at the next meeting we'd prefer one platter of Brie and grape, one of honey glazed ham, and one of roast beef with wild horseradish - and NO cheese and pickle.'