Gourmet Debater Pillows

"My smelly French cheese is much better than your Canadian beef."

"I was with you right up to the cumin."

"You owe me five bucks."

"What do you mean 'sitting is the new smoking'? I thought fat was the new smoking?"

'May future generations forgive you for eating that sausage...'

"Must everything with you be a landmark decision?"

'When you asked me over for a home-cooked meal, I assumed you'd be making it.'

"You know why they make these straws so big? It's a scam to make you drink fast so you can finish quicker and order more."

"Let me get this, but keep in mind that you'll pay for it in other, more subtle ways later on."

Mayo-A-Mayo

"That's it - your diet starts tomorrow"

"Just so I’m understanding the menu, the ‘Old Forge wheel with rosemary-infused pancetta’ is essentially a $36 Hot Pocket?"

'Lets all thank Martha for her very innovative 'Hot Dog Crepes'.'

Avocado Timeline

'School of nutrition - as of today: Butter, good...'

'Nobody goes there anymore.' 'Because it's too crowded.'

'You're cute when you blow your cool.'

'Mine was stone cold.'

Angel's Food cake vs Devil's food cake.

'You are talking about health? Ha! My cig does not have calories, fat, cholesterol, carbohydrates and sugar!'

"Yes, I know that chocolate comes from the cocoa Bean...but that does NOT count as a vegetable!"

"Harold, please -- the wine steward is entitled to his opinion, too."

"Are we pessimists and our stomachs are half empty or optimists and our stomachs are half full?"

'No, I don't have a favorite. Dung is dung.'

'It was the last straw when she threw her lumpy gravy over me!'

"Steak for breakfast, steak for lunch, steak for dinner. . . you can't stop evolution!"

'We don't eat just anyone, ya know. You should feel honored.'

'And just how much is silver going for a troy ounce these days?'

The mushroom pickers

'I'll be late for dinner - a shelf fell on me.'