Gothic Fan Gifts

'My doctor's put me on a strict diet. From now on I have to ask my victims how high their cholesterol is.'

Trilby - 'A happy dinner'.

'Well, I heard the lived-in look is all the rage.'

Vampire practical jokes.

Dracula gets bitten by a mosquito

Drunk Vampire

'At last, dusk...and my e-mails!'

'My teeth are fine, but I think you'll find that your nurse has a couple of cavities in her neck.'

Hi. My name is Vlad . I'm not an alcoholic, but Ido have a drinking problem .

"How come you look SO young for your age...?"

"So which is your star sign, big boy?"

"So, what brings you in today, Mr. Brooks? High anxiety again?"

One vampire tricks another behind a mirror.

A vampire sitting on a park bench at night feeding bats.

Frankenstein working at a hot dog stand.

"Quoth the raven, 'Nevermore.'"

"So besides opera and lurking, what do you do to relax?"

"Nevermore." "You don't have to use 'air quoths' every time."

Nevermore. You don't have to use "air quoths" every time.

Giant Monster in Bath

"Where’s your sense of Gothic romance?"

"The previous tenant was a bit of a shut-in."

Trilby - Finis

Orientation: Welcome to Hell

'It's a little varietal I bottle myself...Type A positive.'

Beware of the Cat.

Trilby - 'Oh my poor girl! my poor girl!'

'You've got those 'take-me-to-bed' eye sockets!'

"I guess I misunderstood when I read you were into 'Bodybuilding'."

"What'd you think the zipper on my face was for?"

The Raven in Flight

She kept Dracula at bay with an episode of the Archers.

Cosmetic Stone Mason.

'You complete me.'

Trilby - 'Ca fera une fameuse crapule de moins'