Gothic Comedy Fans Pillows

"And how would you like your steak?" "Cremated."

"I slept with the skeletons in the closet..."

"Here we are."

One vampire tricks another behind a mirror.

Frankenstein working at a hot dog stand.

'I'd like my £2.50 back'

Dracula acquires a taste for maple syrup.

"So besides opera and lurking, what do you do to relax?"

Orientation: Welcome to Hell

"....and hold the garlic."

She kept Dracula at bay with an episode of the Archers.

First Transsylvanian Blood Bank

"It's creepy thinking that Santa can sneak into my house undetected. I must find out how he does it!"

'Oh great, these guys again! The big guy can't fit inside the MRI scanner, sheet boy falls right through it, and The Count's images never develop...'

Trilby - 'Taffy was allowed to see Gecko'.

Vampire Umbrella

"Wait! First, his attorney."

'This feels a bit strange: Are you really from the Blood Bank?'

'Wow! Did you see who just flitted past? Count Dracula!'

'Which one do you think Dracula's in?'

'He won't bite anyone! I'm hoping it's just a phase.'

Vampire Couple, "I suppose you're out again for your usual eight pints?"

Death Takes A Time-Share

Fresh Blood In Politics

"I've been transferred to the Transylvanian section"

"So, Claire tells me you ate her parents last night."

"The meal was delicious. My compliments to the Haematologist"

Igor leaves an I.O.U. after stealing a brain.

'God's teeth - it's just not the same!'

"As a vegan vampire I suck but I don't swallow."

"Dang it! Honey, this whole batch of type B positive has gone sour!"

"Is that your resting witch or resting bitch face. . .?"

"Blood bank robbery...you?"

Vampire Humor

"Were the x-rays really necessary?"