Gossip Goblin Gifts

Thank You For Not Interrupting My Endless Stream of Chatter.

'Medical school's been more challenging since the cadavers turned into zombies.'

News and Magazines. Celebrity gossip. Sports scandals. Political bickering. We're out of the "information age" and well into the "too much information age"!

"I'm voting for Stephen because I cannot stand Katie's mother, she is so catty! Anyway-- how're your parents doing with the divorce?"

"And now here's Cathie with the hypothetical portion of the news."

'She's so put together!'

Annual run-off at the mouth.

"I'm more of a 'How Jen stays thin' person than a 'Why Jen won't let Brad alone' person."

'Yak, yak, yak.'

'What's wrong? Think the walls have ears?'

Men gossiping

Horror Stories.

"Pssst! I had some CGI done."

"...and she said 'MOO!'"

"Can you recommend a wine that would compliment a divorce?"

'It's a fake - but all the hanging around the water cooler is down 57%!'

'Georgy Porgy kiss 'n' tell story.'

"Whine and cheezed party."

'No. . . I'll never spend £400 on a haircut. . .'

"I guess when your husband dies you'll really understand what they mean by a statistical death."

"And this Halloween, try not to make a specter of yourself."

"If you have any gossip, tell me now - she could come back ay second."

'John, I have to get going. Here's my views on politics, sports, and automobiles in case some of the boys come in later.'

"The incessant chatter was driving me crackers, so I got him his own twitter account."

"Maps to stars' rehab centers."

"So, Tom from accounting—you remember Tom, right? Anyway, Tom yells 'TMI, Gail!' Can you believe he said that?" "Textbook Tom."

The 24-Hour Celebrities Doing Something Stupid Channel.

"Can you keep a secret?"

'Vanity, thy name is Maple.'

"Botox."

"Water cooler talk stations."

'Our new simplified energy bills just have a few options starting with 'Grossly inflated' and progressing to the premium 'Bloodsucker' package. . .'

"Here they come: Detox and Botox."

“Rumor has it, it’s happy hour.”

"It was the unsubstantiated rumours that attracted me to you in the first place."