Goodie Bag Enthusiasts Pillows

'No swimming. No breathing.'

'Colin's dying to show you how his renewable energy scheme works.'

(Visual gag) Wellard's annual BIG HANDBAG SALE!! A woman is dragging a huge bag out from a bag shop

"Trust me, this is as weird for me as it is for you."

'It's a farton, fartoff lamp!'

"No thanks, I brought my lunch."

"Mom, no raking for me this fall! Got any more leaf bags?"

'Tell your mom you coughed it up and you're guaranteed a day off from school.'

Good Dentist ~ Bad Dentist

To them it's just a Prada handbag

"I just wonder if the brand name is too obvious."

'I haven't had the urge for a cigarette for two days. How's the patch working for you?'

"Yikes! Okay, I'm going to pretend I didn't see this."

"We'd like a quiet table for two where my wife can justify spending three grand on a handbag."

"I blacked out for ten minutes this morning - Then I realised I had put my hoodie on backwards."

Wise man scaring baby Jesus.

"Which free tote goes best?"

"Any bag that can hold all my things becomes too heavy to carry."

'And here's the crown jewel of the collection. It's an '86, totally organic, and the UK Bag Manufacturers' Association rates it a 99.'

Chiropodist is wearing a gas mask while treating a client.

Handbags at dawn. A typical bout of fisticuffs on the rugby pitch.

Kick Me T Shirts.

'Brother John had discovered a loophole in the vow of silence'

'It's my stool sample.'

"I won't need a doggie bag."

Bag Lady.

I need something to hold my tummy in

"Help! I've fallen and I can't get up!"

Commuter X-Ray

"It's the best bag I've ever had, I can get everything in it."

Handbags Authenticated

Suitcase Trailer

"I hate summer, I feel naked and vulnerable without my hoodie."