Golf Greenskeeper Gifts

"Judging by your tan I can see you play golf too."

"You don't throw them back if they're too small!"

Yardless: Please help

The Golfing Accident

Pointing.

A sign on the front lawn of a house reads "Keep off the chemicals".

"When will somebody cut the grass?"

"Must get a longer cable."

'It's okay sir, I'm private Johnson.'

'He lived and died for golf.'

Fish Posting No Fishing Sign

'My name is Herbert J.Whiteside - you must fly for help immediately.'

'I'm finding the greens a bit slow.'

Clearing the castle's moat.

Extra Long-jump

The Gardener's Calendar: Get Your Mower Out of The Shed.

Beware of the Undergrowth.

'Not here, Fred.'

'Here they come, Ben, look alive now!'

Boy squashed under lawn roller.

'Ben, you don't know how nice it is to be hunting with you, especially after fishing with you.'

"Something's trying to get through the Astroturf!"

Mask Autumn

'You beat me by two...but with your penalties I beat you by 150!'

Turd golf...

"The only think we'll be able to shoot at soon will be that right to roam lot..."

As senior assistant groundskeeper, Louie was responsible for dragging the infielders before every game.

Neighbors blowing leaves that are blown back at them.

'How long did you say it was 'til trout season?'

'No, you can't win it. But if you can figure out how to get my wife's car off the lake, I'd appreciate it.'

"Don't worry they will find us. We're still in the park..."

'Want to squeeze a lifetime of hunting into one day? Go with Ben!'

'Ben won a blue ribbon in a field trial. He hasn't been the same since.'

"That's one hole filled, only about three or four more to go."

'The other one, Vince! Grab the other one! He's got a Rolex!'