Golden Year Navigators Gifts

Darby and Joan zimmer frame tandem

Albert & Myra - The End Story

Handle With Care

Aging Support Group

"I can't stay in this hospital bed too long. Everyone will think I'm too old...too fragile...ready for the home. I'm not ready for that!"

"Mirror, mirror, on the wall, go to hell."

"I don't like a school year that begins with 'while you were out'."

Older lady to husband surrounded by dogs: 'Still getting feedback from your hearing aid?'

You Know You're Old When...

"My name is Jane and I've been forty-six for 30 days."

"I look forward to growing dead with you."

Middle Age: When the four letter word you use most is 'What?'

"I'm so old I can't remember who's the smart one and who's the pretty one."

'Admit it, George-you're too old to chase after does.'

"Well, old girl, this is the third act. What, if anything, do we have up our sleeve?"

Life begins at 60

Bad times for retirees.

"I wouldn't worry, at his age grunting to communicate is quite normal."

"It's time to break up the company!!"

"His hip isn't getting any better. I really should have him put to sleep."

Children use their dad as a seesaw base.

"Dear, I'm at that age where things are finally starting to click for me!"

"You know you're old when you have to warm up just to take out the garbage."

"There's more to being a pensions adviser than just handling the figures..."

'Since this is Daylight Savings Time, can we save some daylight and use it next winter?'

Who do you think you're kidding? The cub scouts don't have a "special ops."

The Ten Resolutions

"To assume Leonard has a bucket list, you have to first assume he actually wants to do anything."

'The sixties? Well, you don't sleep as well, can't read anything closer than three feet away and your short-term memory's shot.'

'I'm not that concerned about my prostate ... I'm still trying to survive my wife's menopause.'

'In my day, it weren't just cold - it were bleak an' all.'

'Make your own sandwich. You may be retired, but these are my leisure years.'

"Ready for your birthday present dear?" "Leave the diaper on! Leave the diaper on!"

Old People Hell-Raising on their Motorised Wheelchairs.

'While we realize it's difficult having a sick child at home, Mrs. Mote, we believe you sent Philip back a little soon.'