Gluten-free Lifestyles Pillows

"It might taste a little different. It's gluten-free slop."

Two books: 'The Joy of Cooking' next to 'The Joy of Dieting'.

"Ed's tree hugging was out of control."

"I want to leave myself some caloric margin of error for dessert."

'Can't stand diary products myself, but a job's a job.'

Child Sells Gluten Free Mudpies

'My wife's on a diet. So far she's lost her personality.'

"Hide the file in one of your gluten-free cakes – so the guards won't eat it."

'Would you like that organic, locally grown, carbon neutral, fair trade, trans fat-free, sugar-free, gluten-free and peanut-free?'

"Hmm...any dietary restrictions?"

"One slice—hold the bread."

"Enlightenment can only come when you realize there is more to life than gluten free hot sauce."

"We couldn't find a raw-vegan, gluten-free, sugar-free, non-G.M.O. cake for your birthday, so we got you nothing."

'It says, 'If you want more fiber, eat the package.'

"And for all you people with food allergies, this next song's lyrics contain no gluten or peanuts."

Academy.

'Don't worry. His diet's only last a day or two.'

"If you eat gluten, we have a ton of it in the back."

"There's our cure for the munchies! Gluten, we love your pizza!!" "You're our hero, gluten."

Books or Junk Food.

'It's gluten-free or free range or something. Enjoy.'

'How do we know he's gluten-free?'

"I was the first one to work completely gluten free."

"No, we don't sell gluten-free gluten."

'What you need is some negative growth.'

Gluten-Free Church

"How could they possibly know it's gluten-free, low gi. . . ?"

"Is this house gluten-free?"

'Maybe she's gluten intolerant.'

'Is the homework gluten free?'

Low fat diets.

"None of our items are gluten-free, but they are prepared by people who are."

'Do you want a fright with that?'

"The gluten's back. And it's pissed."

"Run! It's Armagluten!"