Gluten-free Food Lover Pillows

"Enlightenment can only come when you realize there is more to life than gluten free hot sauce."

'Your French dip, sir.'

Heavy man sees 'Comfort Food' aisle

"Fee-fi-fo-fum, I smell Thursday's gluten-free lasagna!"

"I chose to stand up to special interest groups!"

Kitchen Kapers

"We're odd looking but just as good."

"I want to leave myself some caloric margin of error for dessert."

'You're lucky there, Sir. That's the last one in the world.'

"It was wonderful, Henri. Arnold had died and gone to heaven."

'Excuse me - are you organic?'

'Pepperoni: Muse of Pizza'

Victorian Fast Food - 'I'll have the lark pie festooned with eels, a full stilton, two bottles of port,,,'

'I'll give you a bite of my calamari for one of your stuffed shrimp.'

'I hope you all like stuffing.'

A man and baby wearing bibs

"Mom said never use that dirty 4-letter word on vacation...DIET."

"That sister of yours sure has some nerve asking for those leftovers - we earned them."

"There must be a place we can wait on line for an hour before eating."

Child Sells Gluten Free Mudpies

"Then again, an honest profile picture would not have got me a wonderful 'Duck Confit with a Chocolat Creme Brulee.'"

"I only recommend the 24 oz. Prime rib for big fat guys."

'This is gluten free, isn't it?'

'My wife's on a diet. So far she's lost her personality.'

"George often brings his work home with him."

If traffic signs were used in everyday life...

"Get the meat loaf—I hit it out of the park today."

'There was sizzle but no steak.'

'You'll love this, it has no nutritional value.'

'The marvelous thing about a Singles cruise is, if you don't find an interesting man, you can drown your sorrows with interesting food.'

'You may well have eaten fresher fish before but not in this restaurant. . .'

Cook being told what to do by housemaid