Glitch Gladiator Pillows

'It's one of those viruses that corrupt every damn thing.'

Rage.

I only root so hard for my time because I hate your team so much.

His family thought he'd been wasting his life, but Steve Wiebe was about to prove everyone wrong.

"Good news...I found a doctor who says you can still play!"

'I'd better make a note of your blood group...'

American Football.

Punishment for the kicker.

'I've decided to skip my senior year and go directly into an endless cycle of unrealistic expectations and failure.'

'So...worked in 'IT' long?'

Football.

"It was your father's idea - He can't bear to miss a second of the game."

'Quit whining, Sid, and walk it off! I'm not falling for that pulled muscle thing again!'

Musk v Zuckerberg - Rockem Sockem Robots

'Get out there, Holmes, and pile on!'

The Thurston State Hornets make their entry onto the field.

"Well, dad. . . when I was a kid I got in trouble for trampling on the lawn or for beating up others. . . today, I get a lot of money for it!"

A football player accidentally kicks off the head of another football player.

'He has some unresolved issues.'

'He intentionally entangles his face mask in my hand!'

A man reads "Traffic Times" while stuck in traffic.

Football Blockers.

Another entry from the encyclopedia of gaming: Pixel sprain - any physical injury incurred from intense video game play.

'No exceptions, Caldwell! If you want to make this team, you've got to make it past my mother-in-law!'

'Oh, great. Leonard's got quarterback on his jersey. No amount of bleach is going to get THAT out.'

"Good news, you are virus free and should be able to resume hitting each other in the heads as hard as possible this fall."

You Don't Know What It's Like

"You'll get a lot of head injuries but, on the plus side, you won't remember any of them."

Return Of The Flu.

'They're herding you all over the field! Start playing defense...'

Dueling Glue Guns: Glue unto Others as you would have them glue unto you.

'If you wanted me to be cooperative, why did you appoint a lawyer for me?'

Abandon all hope,you who enter here.

'If you want to play in this league, Wilson, you've got to learn to play with pain!'

'Good news. We've decided to give you the game ball.'