Glamorous Parent Pillows

The Yummiest Mummy in the Village

"It's amazing, Darlin', just how fast the kids grow up!"

"Her first word was 'paparazzi'. "

Cry babies.

"Look Mommy, hat!"

"I’ve tried to make this as painless as possible ... clearly I’ve failed."

Impressing dad.

"Those are the names of your children? I went a different route...I memorized my kids' names."

'She's just great with the children.'

Children's artwork exhibition.

"Mother, I think I'm good enough to exhibit on the living room walls now."

'You must be very proud Daphne.'

"Mom! Don't think of me as covered with sand. Think of me as sugar coated."

"Your children are adorable...and so shiny!" "Thanks. I them in dish detergent."

'Sure, a drawing on Facebook has coverage, but nothing wows the family like a spread on the fridge.'

"Can I have another sausage Dad?"

'Oh Darling, you must be so proud: Your first wart!'

Pappa clown views offspring in maternity window.

"Have mercy on me, Mama. Have mercy on Mr. Pitiful."

'I go to St. Patrick's Church, I go to St. Patrick's School, and my name is Patrick. Is it also necessary for me to eat green food?'

'Well, he's definitely got your nose...'

'I'm afraid he's at that age when he's into everything!'

"Boy, do we hate to see this... I'm afraid your child's entire body is an 'innie'."

"Whose turn is it to lick the knife?"

In case of Emergency: Break Glass

'I was an egg in the Easter play.'

"Werewolves of London..."

"Isn't he the spitting image of his Dad?"

'Wow! Your kid looks a lot like you!'

'She posted her first blog today.'

'A generous layer of vaseline makes an excellent tickle repellent!'

"I won it for being the most noncompetitive in preschool."

'Care to gaze upon the peaceful blanket of snow before I send the kids out?'