Girls' Night Gifts

"Maybe I don't walk the walk or talk the talk, but if you need someone to drink the drink..."

"This is a night for white wine."

"Instead of improving myself, I've resolved just to improve on the wine I drink."

This cream won't get rid of cellulite...it just makes it easier to slide into your jeans.

"We really should do this more often!"

"He's perfectly nice, but sort of boring, like good cholesterol or something."

Beefeater cocktail

"I'm having a wine, dine and dance night...without the dining or dancing."

Man: 'So how was your tear-jerker movie Ladies? Did you cry your eyes out?!'

"How was the cocktail, Sir, enough vodka?"

To the Edge.

Joe's 'Talent-Optional' Karaoke Bar

'Currently I'm focussing all of my energies towards getting off this stool after three cosmos.'

"Gals, you know I hate being the center of attention, so for the next 45 minutes I am going to monologue about all the minute details of my wedding planning."

"Pssst! I had some CGI done."

"At our age we should be moisturizing." "Honey, we started years ago... with our lips."

"I always thought I'd be good at getting drunk and crying on camera for Bravo."

I could have danced all night!

Mrs. Claus has a ladies night out.

Superheroes Having a Drink

"Tonight I'm getting together with pals to sit around and croak."

Bingo night.

'You deserve some unabashed fun once in a while.'

"If you don't stop saying 'This whole game is a charade!' we're going home."

'Would you say your glass is half empty or half full?' 'Whose round is it?'

A man reads a book called 'Opening Lines' while a woman reads a book called 'Brush Offs'.

Playing cards.

"Botox."

'I'm looking for male bonding, but I'm a little rusty.'

You have had enough

'Botox...'

Down on Bourbon Street...

"Your shout!"

"Let's see now - have we got everything?"

The Stages of Wine