Getting Expelled Gifts

'You didn't get paroled from school, dummy -- you got expelled!'

'Sure, go ahead! Evolve! It's all the rage, I know! Have fun! I'll just sit here in this murky, primordial soup with nothing but plankton for company. Why should you stay here with your mother? The one who raised you, fed you...'

"I can't get used to being a grownup."

"Sorry, Foster, but I'm letting you go. I just downloaded the 'Scapegoat' app."

"Yeah, you could say I've got mother issues....she told me I have to move out!"

'It's time to move out when Mom says...'

Dog Obedience School: 'I think we're going to have our work cut out with this one.'

"My parents said that until I find a job and move out they will not recognize me as a sentient being."

Fishbowl rebellion.

"Nothing else in my room can spin on the floor like a bottle."

Trust

'What about you...you've been living here thirty years too?'

"Your mother and I think it's time you got a place of your own. We'd like a little time alone before we die."

"Your mother and I want to make your 21st birthday a moving experience. We'll help you pack."

'Son, the world is ripe for the taking ... you better stay home with me.'

"Son, one day two hundred square feet of this city could be yours to rent."

"Lives in the basement and has yet to bring home a dime."

"This is a little awkward, but you've been our guest for a while now, and we all have work in the morning..."

Origins Of Evolution

"Shouldn't you use a plate?"

"Stop with this mathematics dictatorship."

"Be afraid to try new things!"

"All I ask is a chance to ruin my life in my own way."

Estate Agent showing client his parents' house - '...and here's one from our affordable homes range'

'No, thanks. My folks won't let me get any piercings, yet.'

Dog Training.

'How should I know how things are at home, I moved into the pub a month ago.'

Having installed a hydraulically operated wall in their 25-year-old's bedroom...

"Yeah, I've put on a lot of weight, but my master's favourite command is "sit, sit, sit!" I barely ever get to exercise..."

"I do like it here, but I'm ready for my own apartment."

'Male, 38, still living with his parents. They asked us to keep him overnight, so they could change the locks.'

"No need to push, Mother—I'm going."

"Remember, son, no matter what happens to you, we intend to always keep your room at home exactly as it is right now...empty."

''It's me or your stupid racing pigeons' I said - then immediately regretted it.'

"I didn't think you'd still be here at thirty."