Germaphobe Guru Gifts

"Don't forget to take sanitary wipes. You'll thank me later."

"And lately I've stopped washing my hands after only 18 seconds."

"It kind of kills the mood with you leaving every five minutes to wash your hands."

Man sees sign as he exits bathroom: 'Employees Often Wash Hands'.

The new normal

"That's odd. I visited an antibacterial soap website, and my computer got a virus."

Two people in hazmat suits lie in bed

'Let me guess...it's contagious!'

'Gesundheit.'

Superbug Research Go For It / Got it

'I cause sneezes.' 'I cause fever' 'I cause that 'I don't know- I just don't feel too good' feeling.'

"No Hand Sanitiser"

"Geoffrey's a bit worried about lyme disease."

Wash your hands

'I hope what I have isn't catching.'

"Well, okay I'll eat it. But, only if you have a medical team on stand by."

'...and now, Doctor, if you have satisfactorily disinfected your hands,...

ABC Vice Company: Employees Must Squash Hands Before Returning to Work

"The penicillin looks good."

"We're gonna make, Rose! Keep washing your hands!"

Soap Versus Coronavirus

'...and I'm telling you that Budgie sneezed!!'

'We've got a new DNA database...'

"Maybe a little inconvenient, but not a single case of the flu in the entire office."

"Why don't I start you off with the contact information of everyone who's read those menus over the last 14 days?"

'I'm afraid you've got a computer virus.'

Shaking hands will transfer bacteria

"Aways the victim."

'Colds! Sore throats! Flue! Did anyone ever tell you you're a hypochondriac?'

Want to hear a secret? Every time they put a nut in my mouth, I give it a little lick.

'I know it's not around too much this season but I think I have swine flu!'

Yellow Fever: What you may catch if your painter sneezes.

"Think it can last 20 seconds this time?"

"No, I'm not able to transplant your computer's antivirus software into your body. Try washing your hands more often."

There was a nasty bug going around.