Genome Geeks Gifts

'I hope you are not playing God again . . .'

Gifts for a cloned baby!

"Something's wrong with the broccoli. Please take it back to the kitchen and have it genetically modified."

'Oh dear. He's got my eyes.'

"We think it has something to do with your genome."

"My problem is a recessive gene for honesty and a dominant gene for robbery."

Gene Therapy

'Friends, lab rats, country mice, lend me your ears...'

"And what qualifications do you bring to the table beyond being first in line?"

Genetic Fingerprinting.

'A geneticist laid bare my genetic blueprint, and I feel violated.'

'Eureka! I found the gene that causes people to sell low and buy high!'

Ideas that failed: Goliath Goats.

'That's interesting -- I seem to have discovered the gene that makes people want to become geneticists.'

Preparing for Casual Friday at the Genome Lab

'The future of medicine' "It's genomics." "I'd say proteins." "Same as always: economics."

'Darling, we were made for each other.'

'The Algenist meets the Alchemist.'

DNA Xmas.

The dna double helix, with a human family taking the place of the dna rungs (or bases), illustrating genetic inheritance within the family

"No movie deals, no endorsements, no product tie-ins..."

An inbred poodle.

'Despite all the work that has been put into it, it's clear that the genome code is not a get-rich-quick scheme.'

"Fortunately I hold the patent for the gene that's causing the ringing in your ears, and I can refer you to the doctor who holds the patent for the gene that's causing the pain in your ears."

'Ahhh . . . he's got your original nose.'

'You may share 85% of your genetic material with him, but I share 5% tops.'

Genetic Manipulation

'He's making tremendous progress. last week he had three tails.'

Brian works in stem cell research

Baldness Facts