Generational Music Critic Pillows

'What was the first music they ever said 'this isn't even music' about?'

"I guess someone got up on the wrong side of the podium today."

"I like his earlier work better, particularly the ones I said I didn't like at the time."

"New studies show that the so-called 'lucky man' made popular by the prog-rock band Emerson, Lake and Palmer was, in fact, just very well-connected."

Elvis fan holding a sign reading 'NOT MY KING'.

Little boy reading a classic whilst his Dad reads a comic.

"Of course I'm going to give him a tip - he should take lessons!"

"I'm astounded that your dog is channeling Eubie Blake! Has he never heard of Elton John?"

'Horace spends his spare time being a rock critic.'

"This next song is about narrow-minded record executives and their reluctance to take a chance on anything a bit different."

The Music Critic.

"Coming up... more of the same mindless pop songs with repetitive lyrics and nauseating melodies!"

"You play that song once more and I'll break both your hands!"

A singer being criticised

'I hate these purists who play Bach without any pedal'

"What do you mean, who are my influences?"

Snake Eats the Snake Charmer.

'He was an impressionist. Like that Alistair McGowan...'

"I don't do spells. I'm a wizard at deciphering rap lyrics."

Pianist being pelted with tomatoes.

Focus Groupies

The New York Times-Carnegie Hall Poll

"Greatest Band?"

"I'm composing a song for the new administration. It's entitled, 'Hell to the chief'."

"It's witless, repetitive, and irritating. It's great!"

"'50 Shades of Grey?' - Oh you mean the 'Guide to Modern Music...'"

Smashed harp...

The critic as band leader