Generation Gap Giggler Pillows

'I suppose you think you're better than your parents, mister I-Can-Walk-Upright?!'

My Dad, trying to look young. The cap hides his bald spot and the sweatshirt hides his gut!

"Whoa. Someone needs their diaper changed."

"Tell me again, Grandpa, about how you let your freak flag fly."

'Yep,that's it Mr.White. And NOW go, Control-Alt-Delete, then re-enter.'

'I'm doing a school report on 'the aging process,' Dad -- can I interview you?'

'We'll never understand these kids. It's the old evolution gap.'

'I'm going to bed...whatever...'

"I think my parents are pretty old. They remember a time before 'clumping' cat litter."

"We added it just for the millenials."

"Are you one of these youngsters who has a very short attention span?"

"I dooon't know this sooonngg. I'm just heeeere with my daaaaaughter and her frieeeends."

"When I was your age, all we had to know was how to wind."

"My grandson said I was "woke" but I'm 90% certain I didn't even nod off"

"In my day I played a pretty mean cowbell."

"Remember the days we could drink and party all night and we thought guys in their 50's were old geezers?"

"I'm your hip replacement."

"We invented your hair."

"Never ask Dad about technology. He thinks a semiconductor is someone who leads the Boston Pops for half a year."

"A raise?! In my day, if we needed more money, we just borrowed it."

"Grandpa, what was it like living off the grid for most of your life?"

"I'm working on texting my memoirs."

'I'm new up here...where are the men?'

"Don't pay attention to my granddad. He's an old pilot and always calls us 'taildraggers.'"

"That's lovely, dear. Give me a heads-up when manners and intelligence get a little closer."

"I'm glad you boys let me come along with you...it's nice to see how you kids live life! I mean, with youth on your side, I'm sure you live every moment to the fullest!"

"All of a sudden, everyone seems younger than I am."

"I don't know cursive and you don't know emoji. I'd say that makes us even."

"The trouble with children is they don't act like adults."

"Please—no technology questions!"

'That's the trouble with the older generation...they're too intolerant.'

Never Trust Anyone Under Thirty