Generation Gap Grumbler Pillows

"Boy, quit your bellaching. When I was your age, we had to pass through radioactive, shark infested water with Tsunami sized waves."

My Dad, trying to look young. The cap hides his bald spot and the sweatshirt hides his gut!

"Whoa. Someone needs their diaper changed."

"Tell me again, Grandpa, about how you let your freak flag fly."

'I'm doing a school report on 'the aging process,' Dad -- can I interview you?'

'I'm going to bed...whatever...'

"I think my parents are pretty old. They remember a time before 'clumping' cat litter."

'What makes me mad, I was only a couple seats away from all the right answers!'

"We added it just for the millenials."

'...need to design something to bridge the generation gap.'

'Can I help it if she's a rotten teacher?'

"I dooon't know this sooonngg. I'm just heeeere with my daaaaaughter and her frieeeends."

"When I was your age, all we had to know was how to wind."

"Remember the days we could drink and party all night and we thought guys in their 50's were old geezers?"

"My grandson said I was "woke" but I'm 90% certain I didn't even nod off"

Rodin's Irish Judge

"I'm your hip replacement."

"We invented your hair."

'I suppose you think you're better than your parents, mister I-Can-Walk-Upright?!'

"A raise?! In my day, if we needed more money, we just borrowed it."

"Never ask Dad about technology. He thinks a semiconductor is someone who leads the Boston Pops for half a year."

"Grandpa, what was it like living off the grid for most of your life?"

"Google says it's some form of ancient timing device."

'I checked that birds and bees stuff on the internet, Dad -- it says you're full of baloney.'

"That's lovely, dear. Give me a heads-up when manners and intelligence get a little closer."

"Yes, you should have studied harder and no, you can't unsubscribe from 5th grade."

"I'm glad you boys let me come along with you...it's nice to see how you kids live life! I mean, with youth on your side, I'm sure you live every moment to the fullest!"

"Don't pay attention to my granddad. He's an old pilot and always calls us 'taildraggers.'"

"I'm working on texting my memoirs."

'I got a darn D-plus, and that's WITH cheating!'

'Wh-h-hatz-u-upp, dude?'

"All of a sudden, everyone seems younger than I am."