Geeky Pun Collector Pillows

"The are 10 types of people in the world - those who understand binary and those who don't."

'Sorry sir, we've run out of parmesan cheese.'

"Your vocabulary is enlarged."

The Physiciatrist...

Ms. Rusmore

"How much did it cost to have your ears pierced?"

'Do we have any alligator pears?'

'I see adventure in your future. Yes. You're going to be a culinary adventure.'

"Actually, 'Loss of Limb' would be covered under your homeowners policy."

Happy Bifurcation Day,

"Here comes the super-visor."

A Brain Drain

The marketing is out there now. People all know the pizzas are prepared on the premises. So why no customers?

Kind- hearted, nature-loving Jeff built a new improved bird table.

'Wool ewe pullover yourself together.'

'It's only four acres but we're glad we bought it - he's always wanted to be an expert in his own field.'

"The moment he told me he lived in a lighthouse, I knew he was a keeper."

"Why do you call the new sheepdog Bra?"

'I'm writing you a prescription for some people soup.'

Tunnel of Accountants: "You've been selected for a random audit."

"I don't know - the minute I figured out how to make it self-aware it realized it was naked, ran, and hid from me."

Artichoking victim

Bell Hop

"Unplug and chill out."

'Periodic table and avoirdupois weight of the Mendeleev family'

'In the circumstances, I think we should skip the housewarming party.'

"I washed my kilt last night , now I can't do a fling with it!"

"I can't log-on. Some-one disabled cookies."

"I said, ‘I hit on your sister!’"

'You give me goose bumps!'

"Waiter, there aren't any flies in my soup!"

Spiv

"Of course you're bored, sweetie. It's the fin de siècle."