Gathering With Friends Gifts

Bad News on TV and Good Friends on a Sofa

"Are you insane?!" The Velveteen Skunk

"They must be grown-up ducks, because they're eating the crusts too."

'Ahhh...'

Uncle demonstrating chemical experiments to children

"I invited a few friends over who think you should see a psychiatrist."

"Oh, no - Karen baked a cake so dense that not even light can escape."

T"ruly, Susan, I envy no man."

'I can't force jocose if I'm not feeling it.'

"Hi-yah!"

"Can I have another sausage Dad?"

Duke of Clarence (Later William IV) Promenading with Family

Can I give you a slice of the action?

"I'm not eating cookies before dinner. I'm having cookies for dinner!"

"What makes you think I'm dripping it on my shirt?"

"Whose turn is it to lick the knife?"

"I think I'm having pre-traumatic stress disorder."

"Mom, does the Russian borscht you made for dinner give me foreign-policy experience?"

"Mommy's going to teach you how to make a hamburger."

The devil you know and his plus one

"See this jelly wobbling. It was waving goodbye."

"I say it's Kale, and I say it's spinaches shitfaced uncle."

The prying mantis,

'Thank goodness you were wrong mom, dad says a period is what comes at the end of a sentence.'

Every time you make a blend, somewhere, a wine maker dies.

'No. The television screen hasn't gone red - You've got tomato ketchup all over your glasses!'

"Is there any way I can un-drink this wine?"

Illustration from an Unpublished Novel

'Roy! For the last time, don't wave that red one in front of your Dad.'

'Never mind about buying that trampoline. I love your new bed!'

Miniature Cattle Fanciers

"Oh, Aunt Em, it wasn't a dream. It was a place. And you and you and you ... and you were there. But not that man with the straitjacket."

"It may not look like it to you, but trust me, he's hyperactive. It's exhausting!"

"Gracie, today I'm teaching you a Bermudez family tradition...passed down from generation to generation! Vamonos! Out! Now!"

'Look, Dad, I made a pair of boots out of your chest waders.'