Gastrointestinal Crusader Gifts

Symbols on bathroom doors. Women, men, runner

You're the puff in my pastry!

"I did the best dental health poster in the class. I just hope Mr. Tooth Decay doesn't hold a grudge."

'Life is all attitude: 45 seconds of enjoying it...45,000 hours of regretting it...'

"I don't see a destination called 'Veganville' sir."

"I find it so stimulating to learn new software."

Believe it or not: Once upon a time Dads couldn't even boil water.

Ironing day.

Musical Accompaniment to Household Chores.

"Please don't kill me."

"Would it kill you to compost?"

"I've been listening to your podcast. And though I agree with your opinion on deforestation and global warming, I strongly disagree with your claim that I overcook my pasta."

"Hey!-This looks like a good place!"

Ethnic food springing out of a menu.

'Are you the guy who put gluten in the bread?'

"It would kill him to run a vacuum?"

Fumes from furniture

Man in radiation suit with 'Fresh Farm Produce'.

'It's a Volksvegan...it runs on vegetable oil!'

'It isn't supposed to taste good. It's furniture polish.'

Man rolling the world across a shaky bridge between organic food and genetic food.

"They're going to print a retraction - your desserts are not inconsistent."

'When you've finished the washing up and you're certain you've cleaned absolutely everything... you'll always find another teaspoon.'

'Use by June 2007. Gah' - 'Use by July 2007. Double gah.' - 'Best of a bad bunch...'

No matter your skills, there's something you can volunteer to do.

"I could probably keep spring-cleaning till next winter."

'Mom, I cleaned my room like you told me.'

"Let me know when the floor is clean enough for me to put my feet on it again."

'Oh no, green waxy build up.'

"It's cold outside. You're not going anywhere without your oven mitts!"

Cleaner

"You'll have to clean your room by yourself. Your plea for disaster aid has been turned down by the President."

'Come over here and nag me, I'm homesick.'