Gas Guzzler Humorist Gifts

Gas Price Reads: Way Too Much.

'It's an extinction notice.'

'Flight simulator'

'I don't give advice. I'm only up here because it's safer.'

'...and this is the water garden...'

'Flowers? From a garage? You're a darling!'

This is where Brent council sends you

'We've found the problem...'

"This is a terrible table!"

'It's self cleaning, and runs on natural gas.'

The Hypocrite - So Why Can't Someone Do Something About High Gas Prices?

'I can't turn it off.'

"Rising sea levels."

'There! another batch of clean coal.'

"Will this global warming mean we'll have longer summer vacations?"

You Are Here.

'For a little extra we can allocate you a seat inside the aircraft.'

Perfect solution. Free street lighting, and we sell the surplus to the national grid.

'The only problem with solar powered air conditioners is finding a long enough extension cord.'

"There ya go. Cushion rot from farting into the same old chair for 40 years"

Just think! If the mall goes bust, what happens to all that paved-over land? Save our mall. We could roll up the asphalt and start a huge nature preserve. What about current wildlife? Hmm�You're right. I don't think the endangered species act covers mall rats.

An snail shell with a chimney

"Let's not migrate, and just say we did.;"

"I'm doing my part to conserve electricity."

'What we have to do is utilize some pollution control equipment in our manufacturing of pollution control equipment.'

Global Warming.

'I worry that the warm glow from your sense of smug self-satisfaction could be harming the environment.'

'I'd heard that they like to source their food locally'

'They can't help smelling like that -- they're biodegradable.'

'Do Not Pass' and 'Gas'.

'Bring out your biodegradeables.'

Just when you thought it was safe to go back into the water.

'The Cod's off, but you can have whale and chips.'

'You suck milk out of your mum? That's disgusting!'

"Gee, I can even remember back to when you could eat them."