Garlic Connoisseur T-Shirts

"I think I'll have the steak with garlic sauce...."

"I was with you right up to the cumin."

"Your food didn't melt, young man... this is the soup course."

"And which regional cuisine would you be interested in this evening—Northwester, Southwestern, Southeastern, or Northeastern?"

'We must be 50,000 calories away from home by now.'

Omar Khayyam Meets Trader Joe

"I come here for the pepper."

"I cook the sausages in French mineral water, I wear a French beret and I can call you 'Monsieur'."

"Everything taste so divinely artisanal."

The Main Types of Cheese

'I'm sure M'lady will appreciate the mashed potatoes. Our chef uses only grass-fed single-udder butter.'

"Keep your glasses on. It will look like twice as much."

"Is there any way I can un-drink this wine?"

"Have you decided on what you'd like to have?"

Cheese

"How about we settle your tab from the regular season?"

'Pigs feet, sir?' 'Are they pickled?'

Full English Breakfast.

A burgandy from when the dow hit a record high.

"My smelly French cheese is much better than your Canadian beef."

"Just toot my horn and I'll be there."

"And exactly how is the peanut-butter-and-jelly prepared?"

Rejoice! It's time to celebrate the baby cheeses!

Enjoying a picnic at the rugby ground

The Running of the Brie

'Is this a party, a cheese and wine do, a cocktail party, a soiree or just another of your old cronies get-togethers?'

'Six different chefs in six months and they still can't make a decent broth!'

"He's fond of garlic, so his bark is much worse than his bite."

"Regular service or affected?"

"We'd like the roasted homework for two. And fetch us a bottle of your finest toilet water."

'I'm sorry, sir, but it's hats off for the Chef's Special!'

"Of course I love you more than cheese. What a silly question. In fact, cheese and I are just friends. Nothing's going on between cheese and me."

this bordeaux speaks for itself

'Do I really have to remind you again about which one of us earns the truffles, Jean-Claude?'