Gardening Humor Gifts

"You know you've been acting really stuck-up ever. Since you got that stand."

Plant rose trees in a sunny part of the garden.

'Couldn't Peter claim Mr. McGregor's garden was an 'attractive nuisance?'

An Unexpected Guest.

"No! I want to live! I want to live!"

'Ugh Look The whole garden is just one giant cat toilet'

"When will somebody cut the grass?"

'You certainly went to town growing all that lettuce so I've dressed for dinner.'

Flamingo on a bird table feeding from a shrimp container.

"There's got to be a better way to raise potatoes!"

'These spare Christmas decorations make perfect bird scarers.'

Spiro & Pusho: watering the vine and the neighbour.

'Um. . . I don't think that's a candy bar.'

Annual flower having a mid-life crisis in July

Man is injured transporting cacti.

Bird baths with two different kinds of water - sparkling and still.

Bird feeder being used by vultures.

"Must've planted those seeds upside down..."

'Fred's opinion of crab grass is if you can't beat it, join it.'

'I ask you, Larry the Landscaper, did you ever, under any circumstances, promise anyone a rose garden?'

'The grass is always greener on the other side seed'.

'It's only a slug Norman.'

'We want the garden to be stamped with my husband's personality.'

Crazy paving company.

'Everybody's entitled to have a hobby. Mine's growing grass.'

A flower beats up another flower - Genetically Engineered plants tend to be more aggressive than naturally grown ones.

God builds the first lawn mower.

"When is it time to stop smelling the roses and suck up the nectar?"

Wet weather footwear - shoes that are shaped like boats.

'What if your tree grows, Burl? Won't it choke to death?'

'Manure, you say? We always put custard on our rhubarb!'

Trump Chia Pet

Beware Of The Gnome - Look dear how quaint.

'Look what my son gave me!'

Avoid Constant Borrowing