Garden Innovator T-Shirts

'So what's all this I hear about you installing an interesting water feature in your garden?'

"Why don't other people ever do this?"

Dad's got composters on sale at the nursery. SO? So the "Vertical E-Z Spinning Genie" is only $142. I've got a better one already. Where? It's my "put it in a like and let it rot horizontal wonder." And

'We had the window box paved over, too, for Little Tim's cars.'

Snail with Solar Panels

'I'm making one of the craters into a birdbath.'

false perspective in the garden (based on M C Escher)

'Seeing the Winterton's Japanese garden gave us the idea. It's a Kamikaze replica. Full size.'

"Electricity can be generated in the garden using a small dynamo and a false perspective."

'That should see me through until the light evenings.'

"A wet winter, but we're making the best of it."

Yardless: Please help

Sale! Weed Whackers

Genetic modification creating plastic from plant cellulose.

Sea weed harvest.

'Don finally figured out a way to keep the squirrels from getting at the bird feeder.'

The new green legislature requires methane mitigation.

'Think, son! What was that formula you fed that tree?!'

Bird Bath.

'The guy in the scarecrow shop promised me that nothing scares crows better than the 'Giant Fox XR50'.'

"Genetic engineering...Fact File 1"

"I'm now too old to produce milk, and I can't afford to retire as yet, so I've had to diversify..."

You will always find a spot to garden

"Here's the new smart plant...it tells you when you're overwatering it."

Ready, Steady, genetically Modify.

Gene Manipulation

"Central heat. Pretty posh."

Hydroponic Gardening

Gardener of the Year.

'Will it thrive on light from a TV?'

"The latest news on the gardening fashion front is 'Ditch the decking'!"

'Doreen's been all over me to paint the house...'

"So I can eat better here at work."

Environmentally Friendly Transport

'Sewer farm - 100% organic'